Moon Landing 40th - My God, It's Full of Stars!

Happy 40th Anniversary, Moon Landing!

40 years ago today, Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin set foot on the Moon and made it REAL. Hope you'll join me all week for a celebration of space travel and exploration. To start with...

40 Things Armstrong Didn't Find on the Moon and that You Probably Will Never Find There

1. A monolith pointing the way to the next stage of evolutionOr should I call it a Moonolith? (First item and already you want to slap me.)

2. An intact LEM

3. Superman and Solar Man, duking it out in slow motion.

4. Luna Park
The happiest place orbiting Earth.

5. A plane in a crater, no matter what you saw in Weekly World News

6. Werewolves who can't turn into humans again

7. Dracula's vampire castle

8. Werewolves FIGHTING vampires

9. The Watcher
That cosmic voyeur who's as interested in what you've done as what you might have done if you were a little crazy and didn't care that everyone on Earth died.

10. A floating city filled with Inhumans

11. Any kind of "blue area"

12. Robin Williams' floating head
I didn't know that's what they meant when they called him King of the Moon.

13. Cheese. Loads and loads of cheese.

14. An armada, waiting just behind it

15. Cyrano de Bergerac

16. A base ready to take on the universe
In case, you know, the Moon flies off for a day trip.

17. Caves dug out by savage insects my ether ship's crew really wants to explore

18. That Chinese emperor who blasted his ass up there with a throne full of fireworks

19. Souls (creepy!)

20. Amazon Women

21. A giant Egyptian dung beetle giving it a push

22. Footprints... with toes!

23. The Justice League Watchtower
Because there's a lot of crime on the Moon.

24. Lake Armstrong (not that I mind the terraforming, but beaches made of dust aren't exactly what I think of as a good vacation spot)

25. Marvin the Martian's summer cottage

26. This
Oh, people from 1835. Will you never learn?

27. Giant adverts

28. An 18-hole golf course

29. Something in the Moon's eye
Or eyes, for that matter.

30. Tycho City

31. The gun that shot down Apollo 13

32. The TARDIS

33. John Glenn's space fireflies

34. Captain Haddock's empties

35. The Mirror Universe Neil Armstrong waiting for him with a gun
It could have gone down very differently.

37. The camera crew taking pictures of the moon landing

38. Dinosaur-killing bacteria

39. Andy Kaufman

40. A cow in orbit
Somebody should really just get around to shooting one up there.

Comments

smacky said…
That reminds me I really want to watch Superman IV again soon.

"The Mirror Universe Neil Armstrong waiting for him with a gun"

That one is my favorite!
Siskoid said…
"That reminds me I really want to watch Superman IV again soon."

To point and laugh?
Will said…
Of course they didn't find a moon base, it wasn't built until the 1990's.

You know I still look up in the night sky & wish that the moon was still there & not blasted out of orbit.
Mike Licht said…
After 40 years, one thing is clear: the future is not what it used to be.

See:

http://notionscapital.wordpress.com/2009/07/20/the-future-is-not-what-it-us
Doctor Mi said…
CHEESE!

Wallace & Gromit FTW
Austin Gorton said…
Man, it's a lot more crowded up there than you'd think...

We haven't even fully populated the moon with moonbase cities yet, and we already need to find another place to colonize.

That cosmic voyeur who's as interested in what you've done as what you might have done if you were a little crazy and didn't care that everyone on Earth died.

That reminds me, whatever happened to What If Wednesdays? :)
Siskoid said…
Smash: I miss it too. It'll be back to crack in two in time for Thundarr's era.

Doc: Well, the moon HAS been made of cheese for a long time. Or actually, it specifically HASN'T, since the 16th century, when common proverbs held it that only fools could be made to believe the Moon was made from it.

Teebore: I don't remember it being a Wednesday thing (a lot of them were posted on Fridays, for example). Let's call it a recurring feature for when I don't have an idea for something else...
chiasaur11 said…
Actually, Armstrong did meet his mirror counterpart.

It's just that Neil kicked his evil counterpart's ass so hard that the mirror universe went into hiding for centuries.
Colin said…
Hey, you got a Dr McNinja reference in there! Muchos respect.
Siskoid said…
Only accidentally. Vampires on the moon was a reference to Captain Britain and MI13 and then to the Vampires vs. Werewolves on the Moon mini-series.
species 125 said…
No. 41: A NHS Trust Hospital and a Jadoon Platoon
Siskoid said…
I'm already beating myself up for this omission. ARRRRGH!!!!
The Mutt said…
The letters CHA carved into the surface?
Colin said…
"Only accidentally. Vampires on the moon was a reference to Captain Britain and MI13 and then to the Vampires vs. Werewolves on the Moon mini-series."

In which case you need to read some McNinja.

Right now.

I'll wait.
Siskoid said…
I have, I just didn't think of it when I compiled the list.